With Fall actually arriving, it's hard not to just sit outside and enjoy the sunshine (if you have sunshine where you are . . . sorry Norway).  It's not so difficult to take a moment when there is a dog drooling on your lap to go out for an afternoon stroll.

Much like Spring, Fall seems to bring with it a comfortable creative lull and naps . . . and great need for naps.  It's that juxtaposition between needing to do something, but wanted to do nothing and either being fine.  At least for the time being. For the moment though, I think I'm content with taking the time to breathe and enjoy the changes.  Moving quickly through life isn't the only way to get to the finish line, but perhaps its a balance of the two that's really the best journey.

Well maybe not quite like above, or quite yet.  However, my internship with ATC has now come to a close and though I'm being contracted on a show by show basis I have no steady job or living space set in stone for the next few months.  My parents have expressed their enthusiasm of the potential for me to come "home" for at least a short period (until I turn 30), yet I can't help but feel uneasy about accepting too eagerly.  

I have played around with the idea of just traveling for the next few months.  Visit friends, work odd jobs, take up macrame (just kidding).  The problem becomes that I haven't sit still in probably 18 years and I'm not sure I'm any good at it.  You know, just sitting, being content, not needing to do anything AND not feeling bad about doing it.  The truth is though that when one fixates on work, work and relaxation don't happen in the same day typically so learn to balance the two together is difficult if it's never been done before.  I have days of work and days of rest, and no amount of YouTube videos are going to make work feel relaxing.

I'm also a that tumultuous point in life when I really need to buckle down and go after a new goal.  A year out of college and I've stayed busy, but I've just been spinning my wheels.  I admit that a part of me believes that this is it and that's all there is, but the other half says I don't get to say that until I'm 50,m have 2 kids, and a 401K. Like a nomad I have the feeling that I can be anywhere, but I'm tentative to put roots in any one place just yet.  For now I'm going to enjoy the freedom I do have and place less emphasis on what I do, and more on how I do it. 

Hello world, it's been a while.  Now that my stress (insanity) has eased (disappeared) after struggling to get my video and sound designs for "Passing Strange" off the ground (literally considering our projector woes) all seems to be well with the universe.  I would like to say that if I hadn't managed to catch my dreaded SUMMER COLD.  It seems to happen every year, but this year it seemed abrupt and came without much warning.  The upside is that I have fought valiantly and as such my cold is quite mild, which means I should probably be napping constantly instead of feeling guilty about not blogging more frequently.

I feel you man.  Dog.  Dawg?  We start more production talks for "Dream A Little Dream"  but I think I'm just going to take tomorrow to sleep and hopefully I'll feel perky enough on Wednesday to do everything the world demands and more!

I know what you're thinking . . . and stop being a pessimist! You can't fly if you never try.  You also can't fly if you die . . . so be careful about that phraseology.  It could get you into trouble.  I don't have much more than that to report, but I figure it's just the kind of tired, sloppy, hot week that everyone who reads this deserves a snow cone! I'd buy you one, but I doubt you're in the area.  Not to mention I haven't found a Snowbiz around Charlotte yet so I feel pretty lost.  Here's to you, and hope, and rainbows.  YEAH!

Nature has a cruel way of reminding you of not being the only creature (or person) in the universe.  This was certainly less of a shock when I actually used to live with people, but now that I live alone there is more time between interactions on a personal level.  I'm going to ignore the swans that tried to keep me from paying rent this past month by drawing a line in the grass I needed to pass, and instead focus on the life of a very tiny life.  Yesterday I came out of my apartment and (like most day since Spring actually arrived) was greeted by the merry, but slightly drunken, bumble bees.  

I would like to take a moment to say that I really like bumble bees.  They are cute, they do not sting people, and they are like happy drunk people who accidentally bump into you and do one of two things:  apologize profusely, or stubble around trying to regain their since of balance and figure out what the hell just happened.  Both of these scenarios are enjoyable to watch.  However, this morning there was a single, fat bee on the ground.  Not moving, not drunkenly trying to reach equilibrium, dead.  

I was immediately filled with a strong pang of sadness and a surreal feeling I only occasionally experience when something traumatic happens.  It's the same feeling I had when I watched a squirrel struggle for the last moments of it's life after being run over by a car.  I immediately went to my vehicle dropped my stuff of and returned to the bee's side in order to bury it, only to find it had been stepped on by another tenant.  I felt horrible.  Because I couldn't help that bee, and because I think it was a poignant message for many days in human life. 

I don't think it is a coincident that within the same day I started watching "The Cosby Show" from season 1 onward.  It's really funny, I mean if you like Bill Cosby, you would like it.  That is if you haven't see it before of course.  I think we need a good balance of that in our lives.  It helps us remember that there are good moments in bad moments.  I had a flat coke left over from the show I'm doing . . . it was delicious.  I realized today that I'm going to miss my "cigarette time" during the days we have shows (I have to pre-burn a cigarette for the show so I get to act all cool for about 5 minutes without actually smoking).  I'm not the only one who feels this way, but I think it is necessary to read a book, have some tea, or stare into the sun a little just to make sure it and you are still here.  So if you are feeling down I recommend a little Cosby, because staring into the sun kind of hurts and it is definitely not good for your eyes.

Hello Spring!  To the day in fact . . . at least that's what Google told me today . . . and Google can't be wrong.  Here at ATC we are gearing up for our Dionysian Romp Fundraiser which is tomorrow, which will be a mixture of fun and stress.  Mostly stress.  Here's some of our marketing for it on Facebook.

Also in honor of the new "Malificent" movie . . . and our attempts to start cute/funny meme's to boost awareness of the theatre's Facebook page (so people will come see our shows) I have begun making funny pictures of cats.  I actually did three different ones, which I am happy to show below.  I hope they make you smile.

Other than that, it's about the same ole' same ole'.  Reading scripts, stage managing, sneaking peeks at YouTube videos while at work . . . yeah, that's about it.  I did pick up a prop master position, but that's just more work . . . most of it pretty bland.  But!  I do have to get supplies for the actors to roll joints on stage so I guess there is a little bit of dangerous living to be had.  As always the hunt for work (present and future) continues . . . so . . . if you're looking . . . so am I . . . we could, you know, work together.  Just a suggestion.  Health insurance makes me excited.  Cushioned seating a plus. 

Hello all,  it's been far too long since I last posted something, and I realized that everything between "Hedwig" and now has just been a blur.  So, in this moment that I have reclaimed my sanity I figured I should play some catch up.  I am stage managing for our next production "By the Way, Meet Vera Stark", I am knee deep in reading scripts for nuVoices (the play festival), and I am on the lookout for audition opportunities.  There . . . that's it.  I'm sure I've done a lot more, but lets be honest.  No one wants to know about how many times I clean my apartment this month, or how many dishes I can fit in my dishwasher and still get them all clean (it's not as many as I'd like).  About the only two things worth mentioning are:  1. I did a fun promo video for "Hedwig" which you can see below. 

And 2. Myself, and others, have come to the realization that the opportunities for female actress below the age of 25 in theatre are abysmal. I thought it was just me, but talking to a friend yesterday confirmed my suspicions that indeed I was not alone, and also it's not just happening where I am in a smaller city, but in larger cities too.  That's not saying there is no work, however I get the feeling that there is a larger number of younger actress competing for a small number of roles.   On the flip side there are less women in the 30s who stuck with it and more roles in that age range.  Guess we all knew this was coming really when we were told that the film and television market was all about young people.  On the up side, if we still  are in the business by the time we are 50, the roles will just fall into our laps.  So here's with sticking with it!

I couldn't help myself and decided to go looking for videos of one of my favorite film moments from my younger years (and perhaps of all time) to share with some friends I really miss, but am fortunate enough to still be in contact with.  I suppose I could go pasting in up all over Facebook, but figured a nice post on my website would probably be just as good (not to mention I haven't posted in a while).  So in between the five thousand jobs I work while an intern at Actor's Theatre of Charlotte (all I do because I have been asked and I am more than willing) I dedicate my favorite musical moment from a non-musical film.  This is for all the friends and family that have stuck with me even when I have had one too many caffeinated drinks, or have gone sleep deprived for my work, or whatever excuse you want to make up to have this dedicated to you.  Thank you for your patience and your support.  So, here you go.

Finally after moving to Charlotte, NC and becoming an employed artist I was able to get my hands on some real work.  Or at least i think it's work.

Anywho . . . I will soon be a master of the box office, and painting lettering, and . . . whatever else I am asked to do.  With Venus in Fur opening this week it means production on Hedwig and the Angry Inch with soon be swinging into action so I'll most likely have more than I can handle when it comes to work load so I'll just take what I can get for now and enjoy it.  I mean . . . not that I find the work above invigorating . . . I mean stimulating . . . Oh, dear.

Hey-yo! This is certainly a lot later written than I was hoping for, but with the Tent season over, my life spared in Africa, and the up-coming opportunities I am trying to wrestle with I have come to believe that it's about one thing at a time.  I hope to post more regularly (at least once a month to be reasonable), but I have a tendency to gloss over items that others might find particularly interesting.  For example:  I stated that I went to Africa, or Zambia to be more specific.  While there I ate food, went to the bathroom in a hut with a hole in the ground, and survived a dangerous hippo attack.

Yes, that kind of hippo.  The story takes a while to fully explain, but the gist comes down to me in a canoe, and a very upset, territorial hippo.  People keep bothering me about not getting it on camera, but let's be honest, I'd rather be alive without a video than dead and . . . you know.  Well I think that's enough excitement for this edition, so until next time--don't mess with hippo's.  I mean it.

First off I would like to state that I never realized that my last post never actually posted before I left for L.A. However, I figured it was probably best to just go ahead and post it anyway (though I imagine anyone who is looking at this didn't even notice until I pointed it out, but there it is).

Secondly, between the push to finish my honors project, a performance for Barestage, the MSU Acting Showcase, Graduation, and the start of Tent Theatre I have marginally neglected updating the site.  Which I will point out has now been rectified.  I hope to keep up with changes in my life here as I might take trips to both Africa and San Antonio in the coming months, as well as preparing for the "big move" away from Springfield once my contract with Tent Theatre is complete with the end of July.  Meanwhile I am enjoying finally having the time to organize my life into neat little stacks (all the papers I have accumulated since I was born), dabbling in some hobbies, and looking for new mountains to challenge (literally, I was looking at rock climbing yesterday).  Though Tent is very laborious I hope to finally catch up on all those sleepless nights college so graciously stole from me (although I know that's not scientifically possible).  For now that's it, but hopefully these post will come more frequently now that my home internet is strong enough to support me doing edits to the website.  Hope everyone else is enjoying the beginnings of summer and getting out there to have the canoe trip I may not.  Here's to you.